This is where you'll find me

Spirituality and God

2009-02-10T08:39:00.000-08:00

I grew up in a Catholic family and a Catholic Neighborhood, really when you are from Milwaukee; it's hard to not grow up in a Catholic Neighborhood. We went to church every Sunday and I went to Catholic school all the way through high school. At the time I thought everything I was learning in school was true. I didn't question what I was being taught in Religion classes. I just memorized the genealogy of Adam and Eve through Jesus. I had to in order to do well in the class. When I got to high school I started to realize there was a lot to question about religion. I did my questioning, but I never wavered from my strong beliefs because I had a supportive family and church. I was allowed to ask questions and people were willing to talk to me about hard topics like abortion and homosexuality. I was confirmed into the Catholic Church my Junior year of high school and was so on board because my faith was in tune with the Catholic Church I knew.

Some would say the Catholic Church I grew up in was not Catholic. We did things very differently than most. We had liturgical dancers, dramatic gospel readings, hand gestures during the Eucharistic Prayer, and a Priest that encouraged us to think outside the box and question the messages that Rome was sending. I never really understood how much of a gift my Church was until I got to college. I went to Winona State University, in Winona, MN. A very Catholic town, but a public school. I was in a little bit of shock when some students responded to me negatively because I was Catholic. That had never happened growing up in Milwaukee, and going to Catholic School. I got questions like, "Why do you worship Mary and the Saints?", "Where does holy water come from, is there a special plane that brings it from the Holy Land?", and "Why is the Pope so old?"

I started questioning the Catholic Church more and more. Not because of other students reactions to me being Catholic, but I started to see the Catholic Church was not on board with the way I was thinking. I started becoming a feminist activist, and declared myself to be Pro-Choice and I started wondering where my Catholicism fit into all of this. My faith is God has never wavered, but my faith in the Catholic Church started to go down.

I've come to terms with the fact that I still want to be Catholic. I think I can be Catholic and a Feminist. I can hold the political beliefs and hold and be Catholic. Does that mean I don't get angry with the Catholic Church? Of course not! Why can't women be Priests? Why can't Priests be married? Why can't God be neither male nor female? Why is it so bad to think that Jesus could have been married and had sex? Why can't women have more authority in the Church? Why can’t homosexuals get married if they are in committed relationships? Aren’t we totally missing Jesus’ message? He hung out with the lepers and outcasts! He was so radical because he brought so many new ideas. He wanted people to see that there was more to faith than tradition. There is a place for tradition, but there is also a place for change.

I am still Catholic, though I may not go to Mass every week. I am still Catholic even though I don’t agree with everything the Church says. If I did agree wouldn’t that be boring? I have a strong faith, and I will continue my strong relationship with God, even if I decide that I may not want to be an active member of the Church. I’m not going away anytime soon. I can be Catholic and hold my beliefs! God told me so!

I'm recommending a movie this time: Iron Jawed Angels (It's awesome!)

SOA and Georgia

2008-12-02T11:06:00.000-08:00

Protests are interesting things. It's a culmination of all different kinds of people protesting the same thing. I went to the School of Americas protest in Georgia the weekend before Thanksgiving. It was an interesting experience. Loading up 12 people in a 15 passenger van with bread, peanut butter, and jelly. A huge bag of popcorn and puppy chow, driving for 20 hours. Trying to sleep in the van as it barreled down the freeway (that was for Gosia) she misses the barrel! Finally after barely sleeping in a awkward position and next to the heater where it was boiling, or away from the heater, where it was freezing, we got to Georgia. We then went to the hotel, crammed 11 people into a King size room, with barely any walking room, quickly changed, and then went to the gate of Fort Benning. Upon arrival of the gate there was, people with signs, a stage with people singing, and many tables selling shirts, buttons, and bumper stickers. I saw people lying in the street pretending to be dead to show the number of people that have died because of the violence. We then piled back into the van to go to the convention center for Mass. It was a great Mass. They had candles for all the Jesuit colleges and universities and I saw a friend that I have not seen in quite a while. The next morning, we went back to the gate for the funeral procession. We had made crosses with people's names on them that have died from the violence. We honored their lives and prayed for a closing to the school. It was a powerful experience to see all the people from all over the country wanting to see an end to this school.

There were people there who were protesting other things as well, which to each his/her own, but there was free vegan food, and people advocating for the ordination of women in the Catholic Church, and people protesting the war and Bush. I felt a sense of people who cared about the direction that their lives were going in. People who are not happy about something and decide to do something about it. I may not agree with what they are protesting, but I respect their protest, because there are things that I protest, and I want respect from people as well. I love that you can protest things that you are unhappy with in this country. Where would we be if people did not protest slavery, or women getting the right to vote, or the Civil Rights Movement? I'm glad I was able to experience SOA. Would I go back? Hopefully not because it needs to be shut down, but I would protest again. There are people from all over that have different ideas about the world supporting the common cause of shutting down the SOA.

For more info go to: SOA Watch

The book this time is:
The School of the Americas: Military Training and Political Violence in the Americas (Lesley Gill)

There is discrimination..even in recycling?

2008-11-18T10:40:00.000-08:00

Seriously? So I work at Sojourner House, a homeless family shelter and I manage an affordable rental unit as part of my job. Boston just recently passed a law that all buildings that have more than 7 units have to provide recycling for the residents. The building that I manage, never got the recycling program because of the change in the job this summer. So my boss calls the city to find out what we have to do. We have to meet with a recycling official to look at the building and decide what kind of bins to get. We meet with the recycling guy today. Now I have been recycling my whole life, or at least as long as I can remember, so I know how to separate and that you have to clean out the containers. He goes on this whole speech about how to recycle and that you have to clearly mark the cans that are for recycling.....well duh! Then he goes on this rant about how even poor people should recycle. You might have to teach them, because they don't usually know how......are you kidding me? Because they make less money they are stupid and don't know how to recycle? Please......I bet they recycle better than you because it's part of the lifestyle that they live.

It upsets me to see that there are so many prejudices that people hold, and usually they are over simple things like recycling. I think with global warming and the environment that everyone knows the importance of recycling. Especially in a democratic state like Massachusetts. I just don't understand....well he will see when he notices that the people living in the rentals will take on recycling when it is available to them!

The book this time is:
Manifesta: Young Women, Feminism, and the Future (Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards)

Those Radicals!

2008-11-12T09:30:00.000-08:00

Last night I went to Boston College for a meeting about the School of Americas protest. I picked up "The Observer" a conservative newspaper on campus. I was appalled to read an article calling feminism a heresy. They were calling it a heresy because some people change the words in Mass to gender neutral language. So instead of saying "Glory to God in the Highest and Peace to his people on earth", people change it to "Glory to God in the Highest and Peace to God's people on earth". Now, I don't really find anything wrong with this, but the article blamed the "lying radical feminists" who think that they can do anything, when no person is allowed to change the mass (Hello, Vatican II! Oops....the Mass has been changed). Now, I understand if you oppose using gender neutral language,but I do not understand at all blaming it on radical feminists. I don't understand why it is radical to not want to think of God as a man...or a woman. God is greater than gender, so why should we refer to God as male?

Feminism is not at all radical. Believing that everyone no matter their race, age, class, gender, or ability/disability, should have an equal chance at being successful at life is not radical. Wasn't Jesus' message radical? I mean he wanted to change the whole foundation of the church! People didn't understand him at first either. There are parts of feminism that disagree with Catholicism, but there is also a lot of good involved with feminism. There is social justice in feminism and would probably go along a lot with Catholic Social Teaching. It's not radical to think that because I'm a woman I should be able to be on an equal playing field with a man. I think God and Jesus would be on my side with this. We are all children of God are we not? Someday God will answer all my questions around this matter!

The book this time is:
Catholic and Feminist: The Surprising History of the American Catholic Feminist Movement (Mary J. Henold)

What does it mean to be on the outside?

2008-11-06T13:08:00.000-08:00

Last night we had community night with Meg our Area Director for Jesuit Volunteer Corps. We read an article by C.S. Lewis, whom I love, that talked about being in the inner ring of a group or a part of the outer ring. It made me think about the times that I've been in the outer ring, and the times that I've been in the inner. I also started looking at all the people in society that are a part of the outer ring. How do we decide who is the inner and who is the outer? It makes me think back to 1st and 2nd grade when there was no cool group. Everyone was just friends. Then suddenly something shifts and if you happen to be doing or wearing the wrong thing on the day that decides what is cool, then you are a part of the outer ring. I think about my job as a Jesuit Volunteer. I work at a homeless family shelter and also work with people living in affordable rental and home ownership units. I think about the ways that these people are marginalized by society. Boston is one of the most expensive cities to live in and there is a big call for affordable housing. People are losing their homes for all sorts of reasons. These people are then looked down upon by society because they can't keep their homes. People are also looked down upon by society if they choose a job that makes less money. I'm wondering when the American dream became all about money. The jobs that I feel passionate about are never going to make a lot of money. I want to work for non-profits. People who devote their lives to great causes are looked down upon as well. I tell people that I'm volunteering for a year and living on $85 a month, and they laugh and tell me I'm crazy (granted not everyone has reacted that way, but a lot of people have). Why is it crazy to care about society? Why is it crazy to strive for justice....especially in a place like America? Being in JVC has given me a new outlook on life. I've spent a lot of my life being in the outer ring. I had friends there, but I was never one of the cool kids. I feel blessed for never having been a cool kid because it has given me greater understanding of myself. I'm a cool and unique person. I'm valuable even if not everyone sees that. I will not make a lot of money, but at least I'll be happy, and know that I'm bringing some sort of justice to the world.

The book this time is: Meritocracy and Economic Inequality (Kenneth Arrow)

YES WE CAN!!!

2008-11-05T13:28:00.000-08:00

He pulled through baby! Well he more than pulled through, it was a landslide victory! I can't believe it all happened so fast! I was washing dishes at 10:50, they said they would have updates at 11, so I sat down at 10:55, there was a black screen and then no sound, just a picture of Obama saying that he is the new President Elect. I literally jumped out of my seat, I was so excited! I made my housemates change the channel to see if the others had called it, and I was convinced when FOX said he won! I'm just so happy that this great man is going to be our President. He loves his family with his whole heart. (Also really excited to have kids in the White House again!). I've been following Obama since he was elected to the Senate four years ago. I was watching the results for the Bush/Kerry election and they randomly went to Chicago to show Obama winning a Senate seat. When I heard him speak, I knew he was going to be our next President.

The thing that is making me sad is to see the number of people, even after McCain's speech (which was great by the way, sounds so intelligent when he isn't listening to his campaign aids), that people are so upset as to make a facebook group called Impeach Obama. Hello! He hasn't even been sworn in yet, and people are talking of impeaching him. I was pretty bitter when bush won, but at least I was gracious in saying that I would live with him as President. Our country is not all the sudden turn socialist, Barack Obama is not a terrorist, despite his middle name, and the country is not going to fall apart with him in office. Hell, it didn't fall apart when Bush was President. Okay, a little (well there was the whole stock market stuff going on), but then why would you want someone with the same politics to be running the country? Did you really think Sarah Palin was competent enough to be V.P.? I didn't think so. I say celebrate that history has been made! Celebrate a change in office! Celebrate a man who truly loves his wife and kids! And stand behind the man even if you didn't vote for him. I stood behind Bush even though I did not vote for him. We've had to put up with 8 years of his politics, don't you think it's time for a change? Thank you Barack Obama! :) You rule! Joe Biden rocks as well, he'll be a great aid to Barack! Sad that Massachusetts will lose our Governor, even if he says he won't be a part of his cabinet. Right........!

I'm recommending to go and read all of Obama's speeches. He is a great speaker who knows how to motivate people and win an election!

It's Election Day!

2008-11-04T12:02:00.000-08:00

Oh my gosh! I'm so excited, I can't believe it's actually here. I've never been so excited about an election before. It's so close though, I'm choosing to believe that Obama will pull through. I think the country is ready for a black President. Contrary to what some people believe. I think we give the United States people too little credit. Look at the Democratic primaries. Who ever thought it would come down to a woman or a black man? That in itself is groundbreaking. Plus people are fed up with the economy and the Bush administration and McCain/Palin are pretty much the same as Bush. As many times as they want to say that they are mavericks....um......no. John McCain is not a maverick because he has been listening to his campaign people way too much and has made himself very unlikable. He has even sunk so low as to call someone a terrorist and likened Obama's policies to socialism.

Here's the thing about socialism, is it really all that bad? To have everyone on an equal playing field? I believe some things should be socialized, like health care. Why shouldn't everyone be able to go to the doctor? Why should we have to pay so much money for medicines? Canada makes socialized health care rock! There are no long lines and everyone has a chance at seeing a doctor or specialist when they need to. It's when socialism is corrupt that it is not a good idea. I think certain jobs deserve to be paid more than others. Socialism as an idea is not bad, it's when the idea is put into the wrong hands (i.e. Joesph Stalin).

I feel so passionate about these ideas because I'm working with homeless families. I see what people go through to pay for medication for themselves and their children. It shouldn't have to be a choice between medication and food. Everyone should have access to housing, medication, and food. It's a justice issue and the U.S. should be about everyone having equal access to the essentials in their lives. All of these reasons and many more are the reasons that I voted for Obama/Biden!

Taxes....how interesting!

2008-10-21T12:59:00.000-07:00

Tax cuts for the rich or for the working class? How do you decide? Should people who make more money be taxed more? Why should they be punished for being successful in life? Here's what I think....YES! I understand that someone who makes a lot of money may not want to give up their "hard-earned money", but then what makes someone think that somone who does not make a lot of money should give up more? It makes sense that taxes are based on your income. If the wealthy people don't have to pay higher taxes, and the poor people cannot pay their taxes, then there is no money for the government, which then cuts government programs that are designed to help people who need it. This makes our economy go down and then there is less money all around. Hello! We know trickle-down economics does not work, it doesn't actually trickle-down. Sorry Raegan enthusiasts. Also the amount of work one does is not always reflected in their paycheck. I worked my butt-off at Target, running around the store getting call-buttons, answering questions, and back-up cashiering, and I did not get paid anymore than the person who fooled around their entire shift. A CEO works very hard, I'm not denying that, but it does not mean that a person in a minimum wage job does not work hard also. So because the CEO makes more money, I say yes, he/she should have to pay more taxes. Is it fair to only tax people who make less money, no because then all their money goes to taxes. I know we are not a socialist country, but we are all about living the American Dream. This means everyone that lives here should be able to sustain themselves. Right now that is not the case, so we should be working to make sure that everyone is clothed, fed, and sheltered. This is what tax money should go to...helping our fellow Americans. Go taxes...because without them it would be a pretty messed up country we would be living in!

The book this time is: The Constant Princess (Phillipa Gregory)

Juno Revisited

2008-10-14T13:53:00.001-07:00

The first time I saw Juno, I absolutely loved it. It has great music, great dialogue, and great characters. I was so caught up in the humor and music that I didn't even really think about the movie's message. I went to Winona, last Spring for the Rock Against Violence Concert put on by FORGE (Fighting for Our Rights and Gender Equality) and NSFC (Nursing Students for Choice). Before the concert started I went to Target with a friend of mine. Juno had just come out on DVD and I naturally bought it and watched it again. Again, too much in my own head to think about the message of the movie. I asked my friend, "Didn't you just love it?" to which she replied, "not really, I enjoyed the music and the humor, but the movie portrayed abortion clinics in the completely wrong light." This comment really made me think. It's not true that when you walk into an abortion clinic there is a girl sitting there chewing gum asking if you want a free condom. There are counselors there to help make the right decision for you, and in no way try to persuade you to abort the fetus, if you don't want to.

Now because some anti-choicers saw the movie, and the fact that Juno choose to have the baby and give it up for adoption makes the movie pro-life? Um....no! She had a choice, that is what pro-choice means. She made have made the choice that anti-choicers wanted her to make, but the movie made a swift move by her step-mother asking her if she had thought about "the alternative" (abortion) Which shows that her parents would have been just as supportive if she has chosen to abort the baby, but that would not have made for that interesting of a movie. The other thing that gets me is that "pro-lifers" didn't seem to upset by the fact that teenagers were having sex at 16. A major issue in the U.S., but apparently not as big of an issue as abortion. Abortion is a necessary choice until the government understands that they have to set up programs to help single mothers or single fathers. Also, there's the whole issue of abstinence-only sex education. Denying the fact that there are many teenagers out there are having sex.

I still stand by the fact that I love Juno. Not only because of the music and the witty humor, but because it tells a tale of choice. Being pro-choice does not mean that you are pro-death. Likewise, being pro-choice does not mean pro-abortion. It means choice, and not limiting choices to women.

I recommend seeing Juno again (or for the first time) it will make you laugh and cry.

Washing machines amaze me....

2008-10-09T13:32:00.000-07:00

Really it's true. I am fascinated that I can stick a bunch of dirty clothes in a machine, it fills up with water, shakes around the water and the clothes, and drains the water, and then poof my clothes are clean! Seriously! Think about all the time I save by not having to scrub my clothes. I just wonder how the machine does it with out so much scrubbing. What happens between the clothes and water and soap going in, and the end? Does it have magical hands that come out to clean the clothes? I'm just fascinated.

Seeing how much time the washing machine saves me makes me really appreciate the machine. I have great respect for it. I can turn on the machine, walk away, and then 45 minutes later my clothes are clean. I can read a book while it happening, watch a movie/TV, or now I do it while I'm working. Thank you Sojourner House. We do not have laundry facilities at out house so I get one of those fun carts that and put my laundry bag in. Take it on the bus...which is a struggle let me tell you...and then can load it in the machines at work. It's great and free! My other housemates have to pay for laundry at the Laundromat. It's figured into our monthly paychecks.

Why don't they make a space on the bus for people with strollers and carts? It's such a struggle for mothers to take their kids in a stroller on the bus, and such a hassle when you have the laundry cart. The route I take is crowded and busy, no matter what time of day I take the bus. There should be an open space in the back of the bus for strollers and carts. Just make the accordion style bus, and don't have the seats in the second part. Just have areas to stand with the carts and strollers. Yesterday, I brought laundry to work and the bus was crowded when I got on. There was already a woman with a stroller on the bus, and I couldn't get through with the cart. This woman who was already sitting, then decided to tell me that she was getting off in a couple of stops and I couldn't stand there. I literally could not move. I was almost falling over because I didn't have anything to hold on to because of the motion of the bus. She then proceeded to lift up my cart, put it on top of the seat, and then I had to hold on to it so that she could get off the bus....10 minutes later. It was pretty hysterical to see me on the bus, holding onto a cart for dear life because this woman was getting off the bus in 10 minutes. Exactly the reason, we need accordion style buses with no seats in the back so that strollers and carts can go there. It would make the laundry bus trip so much easier. Maybe I will style the bus, and sell it to the MBTA and then I could make a lot of money and work for a nonprofit and support myself. Now that's a concept!

The book this time is: Wanda'a Washing Machine (Anna Mcquinn and Jan McCafferty)

There's a fine fine line...

2008-10-08T12:52:00.000-07:00

What a crazy day I had today! First though exciting news....I asked my supervisor at work if I could work more with the families that are residing at the shelter as well as the people in the permanent housing and she said yes. So I got to go to the Homes for Families meeting today, which was interesting because we got to listen to a woman speak about the government in Massachusetts not cutting government programs that help the homeless. There was a woman there who is currently homeless and living in a shelter and she said that she thinks everyone should be homeless at some point. Really? I would never wish that on someone. I mean I know what she was trying to say, that we should be more aware of what homeless people go through on a daily basis, but to say that we should all go through the experience is a little far. There's a fine line between going through it and educating yourself about it. I think we should do more research about homelessness and how to eliminate it. Government programs need to do more than just provide questionable living situations and then turn a blind eye. But, to actually say that we need to experience homelessness is not quite right.

On another note, there is a new family at the shelter and some extenuating circumstances and the mother was not living at the shelter for a few days. The kids went to school and somehow told the school that they didn't know where their mother was and where there were living. So naturally the school wanted to know what was going on. They called the shelter, we assured them that everything was fine and that the kids were being cared for, but the school went beyond and asked who the legal guardian was. They don't need to know that. Sometimes I think that people are just nosy and want to know every one's business. It's not important who the guardian is, they just need to know that they kids are actually living somewhere. Don't keep prying and prying for information. This is just like teachers diagnosing kids with ADD and ADHD. I understand referring someone to evaluate the child, but to tell the parent that their child needs to go on medication. You are a teacher, or administrator, not a doctor. Don't tell a parent their child needs to go on medication when you are not a person to can legally diagnose children. Please stick to your fields of expertise.

The book this time is: Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India, and Indonesia (Elizabeth Gilbert)

Surprise!

2008-10-06T08:31:00.000-07:00

We had October Retreat this past weekend in Voluntown, CT. It was at the Voluntown Peace Trust, which is this awesome sustainable farm. There are buildings on the grounds that were built for different purposes, like common meeting space, and sleeping. They are built out of materials that are cheap, but last a long time. The farm grows veggies that are then given to families in Voluntown if they choose to participate in the program, which entails paying a certain amount and then getting the veggies that are in season. It's really cool. It has been known as a hippie commune in Voluntown, but it's so much more than that. There was a lot of stigma around it, but the town and the people living there seem to be in a better place. The Voluntown Peace Trust is all about promoting peace. They have a ton of books on nonviolence and participate in a lot of nonviolent acts to end war. It's a way of living that I'm definitely going to look into.

So back to the surprise part. We decided on the drive back to Boston that since we had the van rented until Monday morning, that we should go up to Maine. We were kidding at first, but then we decided to just go for it. Jen, one of my Housemates, is from Portland so we went to see her family, and then we surprised the JVs in Portland by showing up at their house. It was so much fun! We went to the top of a hill to see all of Portland and then we went to the beach to see the ocean. Not that we don't have ocean in Boston, but it's beautiful in Portland. The trees were beginning to change color and the water was gorgeous. We ended up staying for dinner at the Portland house and hung out with the JVs for a while. We signed their tablecloth and then we drove back to Boston! It was really fun to just decide to drive up to Maine. None of us have a car, so we decided to make good use out of the one that we had rented.

Retreat was really great. It was a good break from the craziness of our jobs and a chance to relax in nature. It was near Beach Pond in CT, so we walked down to the water and it was nice enough on Saturday that 2 people just decided to go swimming. I learned a lot about my housemates and we just had an awesome time. We also got to listen to the debates on the radio on Thursday, which was great, because it never gets old to hear Sarah Palin say, "God bless their hearts" or some other term that she uses to make herself sound homely, and like a family person. Seriously, I don't want a person in power to talk like an everyday American. I want them to sound intelligent and like they have some sort of public speaking skills. I think it makes her sound inadequate because she then sounds innocent like she doesn't actually know what she is talking about. Oh dear, we are in for a treat on Nov. 4th. :)

Pictures of Maine are coming soon.

The book this time is: Feminism is for Everybody (bell hooks)

If I had a superpower.........

2008-09-27T14:13:00.000-07:00

Did you ever play the icebreaker where everyone says what superpower they would want? I've decided that the superpower I would want would be the ability to stop time. It would make life so much easier. My main reason for wanting to have it is to get more sleep at night, because I hate getting up to an alarm. I don't mind getting up early, I just hate having an annoying noise tell me it's time to get up. I'm working on training my internal alarm. Anyways, when the alarm went off and I wanted to sleep more I could just stop time, go back to bed, and it would be the same time when I woke up naturally. Amazing! I would never be tired again. I could stay up late and get up early, the best of both worlds.

Sometimes I just really like staying up late. It makes me happy when I can stay up late and just enjoy the late night. Sometimes I watch movies or DVDs of TV shows or read. Then I instantly regret staying up late when I have to get up in the morning. See, the power to stop time would come in really handy then. Other times I like going to bed early. There is something about getting in bed so early and just sleeping and not feeling super tired when your alarm goes off in the morning. I've even taken a liking to getting up earlier on Saturday mornings and enjoying the morning. Sometimes I like to read, or today I made pancakes, which were great! Although the smoke alarm went off.......

Our smoke alarm goes off when it doesn't need to. It didn't go off when I was making pancakes, but after I was done. What was the point? There was no fire, and no smoke, not to mention it had the unfortunate mistake of waking up my housemates.....oops. The pancakes were delicious though. Just like my dad makes them. Nice and thin. Yum!

The original point is the ability to stop time, which would be great in other instances too. Like needing more time before you have to go to work. Needing more time because you are late. Stopping time when you are enjoying a moment with friends and family. When you don't want a holiday to end, or the end of a year. It all would be great if I could stop time, but then again.....that begs the question....am I living in the now? What is the power of now? There is something to be said for living in the moment. Maybe it's worth staying up late when you are having fun, even if it means being tired. I don't really regret staying up late because I was enjoying the time that I was staying up late. There's always time for sleep later in life.

Nope! I don't want to have a superpower anymore. I want to appreciate the time I'm living in. There's a reason things only last so long. Now I feel like the movie “Click” because he could control time and then he didn't want to control it anymore because then he wasn't enjoying the small moments in life.

The book this time is: The Cronicles of Narnia (C. S. Lewis) They are all great, and they go through many different phases of time. :)

Calvin and Hobbes

2008-09-23T08:50:00.001-07:00

When I was little, I would ask my dad to read me the comics. He would sit in the black recliner, I would sit on his lap and then he would read me the comics. It was our little Sunday tradition. One of my favorite Sunday comics was Calvin and Hobbes. I enjoyed that Calvin had an imaginary friend and they would go on adventures together. I never really understood why it was funny until I got older. Calvin and Hobbes is hilarious! Calvin does polls of his dad meaning that he polled himself and would talk about his dad going down in the polls. He played CalvinBall with Hobbes, which basically had no rules, but somehow Calvin always lost. He used a big box as a spaceship, a superhero change area, and as a sled. He tortured his neighbor Susie, but you know it was because he had a crush on her. I think some of my love of Calvin and Hobbes came from my sister. She asked for the books for Christmas and her birthday and then when she wasn't home I would sneak into her room to read them. It was part wanting to read Calvin and Hobbes and part wanting to be a part of her life. My sister Angela is one of the most fascinating people I know. I'm posting some Calvin and Hobbes comics. Take some time to read and enjoy an old classic.

P.S. A great present for me would be The Complete Calvin and Hobbes box set.

The book this time is: Any Calvin and Hobbes Book (Bill Watterson)

Pretty Pretty Princess

2008-09-18T11:45:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite games when I was a kid was Pretty Pretty Princess. I think it had a lot to do with the crown. I always wanted to be a princess, but now I wonder why? Princesses are not free to make their own decisions, they don't really have a say in their lives. I have complete control over my life and I love it. Imagine if you had several people telling you what you were going to do, who you are going to marry, what job you are going to have......if you even have one, what clothes you are going to wear, and where to go on your social outings. I love my life because it's free. I can wear what I want, say what I want, and be who I want to be. I like that I'm weird and laugh really hard at things that aren't that funny. I love that I'm passionate about changing the world. I think we can do it. I actually think there may come a day when everyone, no matter what their gender, sexual orientation, class, race, and disability/ability is, we will all be given an equal chance to be successful in life. I know I think big! How can I not? It's the big thinkers that make changes and make things happen. MLK Jr. was a big dreamer, FDR was a "think outside the box kind of man", and I am someone who can change the world for the better!

The book this time is: Listen Up: Voices from the Next Feminist Generation (Barbara Findlen (editor))

Tina Fey as Sarah Palin.....soo funny!

2008-09-18T11:38:00.001-07:00

Anti-Feminism Strikes Again!

2008-09-12T07:31:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wonder how far our country has really come. Like not at all because I was reading the Metro (the free newspaper at the T (subway) stations in Boston that you are supposed to be able to read the entire way through on your commute) and on the political page there was a section with Cindy McCain and Michelle Obama ranking them as Hot or Not. Are you kidding me? Is that why I should vote for a canidate because his wife is hot? It sickens me that this is in the news or even done at all. This is why Hilary had such a hard time with her campaign and they are doing it to Sarah Palin as well (they made a doll of her). I don't like Sarah Palin, but she still deserves to be treated with respect and dignity. What century are we living in? This then makes me wonder about the people who think that feminism in dead and we don't need it anymore. Oh we do! As long as this kind of thing is still happening we need feminism. We need people to stand up to the injustices in the world. What would Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Alice Paul, and Lucy Burns think of all this? I'm pretty sure they would hate it and fight against it. I will take you on society, I am not afraid. Look out world, here comes Nora!

The book this time is: The Fire this Time: Young Activists and the New Feminism (Vivien Labaton)

The Dreaded Life Update

2008-09-11T10:43:00.000-07:00

My blog is not meant to be the blog that updates you on my life. It's meant to be the place that I write down my random thoughts on the world. I feel though that since I recently had a life-changing move to Boston I should update you on what I'm doing. I got to Boston about three weeks ago. I live in Jamaica Plain, which is called JP by the locals. It's a neighborhood of Boston. Our house is huge! There are 5 bedrooms and 3 floors. I'm living with 5 other girls. We are all volunteering for the year at different jobs. I'm working at Sojourner House in Roxbury (another neighborhood of Boston) as the Permanent Housing Coordinator. Sojourner House is a homeless family shelter, and they recently built affordable rental units and affordable home ownership condos. I get to work with the people living there. It's a lot of work and a little overwhelming, but it's going to be a great job. So far, I haven't really done much with the tenants because my boss is really busy, but we're having a tenants meeting on the 25th and I will get to meet all the tenants. So excited!

My housemates are Hilary (working at the Women's Lunch Place. A place where women can come during the day to eat and wash their clothes. Most of them are homeless), Caseye (working at St. Stephen's Episcopal Church after school program), Heather (working at Casserly House, which during the day has English classes for recent immigrants to the country, and has an after school program as well), Jen (working at North Cambridge Catholic High School, it's a Cristo Rey school so all the kids work at Corporations one day a week) and Kathleen (also working at Sojourner House, but she is working with the Children's program).

It's been a whirlwind since we got here. We had a tour of the city and visited all of our sites. We then started our jobs and have been living in community with each other. We make a point of eating dinner together and we have little money. To be in solidarity with the people that we are volunteering for. We get a personal stipend of $85 dollars a month, and then we each get $75 for food and money to pay rent and all our other bills.

This weekend there is a fundraiser for JVC at Boston College High School for the New England area. I'm excited to meet people that support us and want to see us succeed. Also 2 weeks ago, we went to a bar in JP to watch Obama's acceptance speech. I was interviewed by a newscaster because there were so many people there, and the video is posted on the Internet! So exciting! Mike Fitz, who is a former JV took us to the event and he was interviewed as well. I'm posting the video so you can see my lack of interview skills. Note to self: work on not being so fidgety. That's all I have for the update. Stayed tuned for more of my random thoughts.

http://www.necn.com/Boston/New-England/Obama-supporters-gather-to-watch-a-milestone-in-American/1219983116.html

The book this time is: The Other Boleyn Girl (Philippa Gregory)

Pro-Life Really?

2008-09-08T11:57:00.000-07:00

Sarah Palin has suddenly become a person that a lot of discussion is centered around. It's because she was the most random person to be picked as the running mate of McCain. This woman is so interesting to me. I watched her speech and I can tell you that she is a great public speaker. She knows how to keep her audience interested and knows just the right time to put in plugs of her own personal life. She is a great person who obviously loves her family and loves being a mother. Here's the thing that I don't understand about Sarah Palin. She has declared herself multiple times to be pro-life, when she is no where near pro-life. She may oppose abortion, but that does not make her pro-life. She supports the death-penalty (not pro-life), she supports ruining that natural habitat of Alaska, which means a lot of wildlife would die (not pro-life), she supports gun rights, which I know that guns do not kill people, people kill people, but guns make it a whole lot easier for people to kill people (not pro-life), and she supports the war (not at all pro-life) even if your son is in the armed forces. Killing innocent people is not pro-life.

We have come to use pro-life as a term that only applies to abortion, but shouldn't someone who is so adamantly pro-life be pro-life in all aspects? The other thing that is so interesting to me is that her daughter is pregnant, and she still supports abstinence-only sex-education. Really? Come on! Your 17 year-old daughter is pregnant, and you are forcing her to get married to make it look better, when it really screams a public service announcement for comprehensive sex-ed programs. Let me also tell you; her daughter by deciding to keep the child had a choice. That's what pro-choice is, a choice. I hate abortion, but I also know based on research that the number of abortions actually go down when there is a pro-choice president in office. The Republicans seem to think that by outlawing abortion and anything that has to do with preventing pregnancy will someone make it all go away magically. Hello! Women did not start having abortions when they became legal, they were having them long before that. They were just dying from them because they had to get back alley abortions and the doctors wouldn't use clean instruments. So really, by outlawing abortions you are destroying two lives. The unborn baby's and the mother's. I think we all need to look at Sarah Palin, knock some sense into her and let her know that she is not pro-life, like she states, she is very very very anti-choice, which only gives me one choice this fall. I think you get the picture.....

OBAMA/BIDEN '08

I'm begging you all please to do some research on McCain/Palin. They are playing the nice card, but there is so much info about them out there....don't become a puppet in their show. Use your voice and make an informed decision. Even after you do research and think that McCain/Palin are the right people I will support that because you made an informed decision.

The book this time is:
Dude, Where's My Country? (Michael Moore)

A New Experience

2008-08-29T09:57:00.000-07:00

I moved to Boston! It's quite exciting and a little overwhelming. I'm just finishing my first week of work and what week it has been. On monday I got here half an hour early, and then went to the affordable housing units with my supervisor. Then she took us (Kathleen and I, Kathleen is another JV working with the Children's program at Sojourner House) out to lunch. Then Kathleen and I ran errands with Ruby (Kathleen's supervisor), what a hoot. Ruby is the most energetic person I've ever met. We had to go to her eye doctor to pick up her new glasses and she argued with the doctor about the perscription being too strong. It actually wasn't because it takes some time for your eyes to adjust to the new glasses.
Tuesday Stasia (my supervisor) had me scan some documents for her and help her clean up her office. Wednesday Stasia wasn't here, so I helped Kathleen with the Children's program. Thursday we went sailing with the kids around the Boston Harbour. How exciting! I got some beautiful pictures of the Boston skyline. Today I've been helping Stasia, and we went to the units again. We had to meet with the gas guy because the gas had gotten turned off.
I know I'm in for an exciting and stressful year. My housemates are great, but we are all so different from each other. It's interesting to get to know them and try to understand their life stories.

Boston is beautiful, but so confusing. The units are 10 minutes from my office, but the streets twist and turn and are one-way in some areas. You can tell that it's pretty old. We got to walk part of the freedom trail, which was so interesting. I love reading and learning about history, but I can't really take a history class. I like that I can look up the information or ask questions, but I don't have to remember it all for a test. So glad I'm not in school anymore, but we'll see once this year is over. Maybe grad school is around the corner.

The book this time is:
The Power of Now (Eckhart Tolle)
I'm reading it slowly, but finding it to be one of the most interesting books I've ever read)

Cheese Pizza

2008-07-25T19:06:00.000-07:00

Today I went to the mall to return some items and I was in the food court eating. I decided to get some Rocky Rococo Pizza, which if you don't have them, it's a fast food pizza place that sells square slices of deep dish pizza with delicious, but greasy bread sticks. Anyway I got sausage pizza and was enjoying my meal when I saw a mother and her 5 or 6 year old daughter at the table in front of me. She asked her daughter what she wanted to eat and she said cheese pizza. It made me think about when I was that age and I realized that I loved the simplicity of cheese pizza. It's bread, sauce, and cheese. I don't know why it tastes delicious, but it does.

I remember that I would eat sausage pizza when I was a kid. Never pepperoni. Don't ask me why, I just didn't like it. Now I do. I just remember getting so excited when I could convince my parents to buy me a tombstone extra cheese pizza. I did not like the three cheese kind, it had to be the extra cheese kind. I think it was special because the pizza was only for me. When you grow up with sisters, it's hard to have food that is only for you.

Sometimes I wish I could go back to the simplicity of cheese pizza. My world was so small then. All I cared about was trying to get my sisters to play with me, and reading and watching my favorite TV shows. I think we tend to get so wrapped up in the world and the politics of what is going on that we forget the little joys in life. I know that the world is at a very pinnacle point, but what if we all took a step back, had a slice of extra cheese pizza and just laughed and enjoyed our differences. Wouldn't it be great if the world's problems could be solved by a cheese pizza? It's like resolving a conflict when you are a kid. You stole my toy, so I got mad and took your best friend status away from you. The next day you come back with the toy and a cheese pizza and everything is solved. Your best friend status has been reinstated. I think we need to pay more attention to children and the impact that they make. They are a whole lot smarter and more intuitive than we give them credit for. So from me to you, enjoy a slice of cheese pizza!

The book this time is:
The Very Hungry Catepillar (Eric Carle)
It's a kids book about eating! How appropriate!

Boston here I come!

2008-07-23T18:24:00.000-07:00

I'm moving to Boston for a year!
I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I am! I'm volunteering with Jesuit Volunteer Corps and I will be working at Sojourner House as the permenant housing cordinator. It's a homeless shelter that built affordable housing units and now I work with the tenants that are living there. I will be doing PR work and using my degree which makes the experience even better! I leave Aug. 14th, but I'm flying to Baltimore for orientation.

The funny thing is that it took me forerver, and I mean forever to do my application. It was hard to think about myself so much. I'm not used to looking into my mind and figuring out why I believe what I believe. It was hard to express my thoughts into the essays, which is weird because I've never really had a problem writing before. It's easy for me to spurt out papers with good arguments. I could write 12 page papers in 3 hours, but it was hard to write why I wanted to volunteer and live off $85 a month. I had even convinced myself that I didn't want to do it anymore because I wasn't ready. I knew in my heart that I was ready, but it's hard to have this passion, which means giving up a career for a year and making money, because you feel like you are drawn to social justice. One very long and emotional phone conversation with my sister Elana changed all that. She helped me understand that I wouldn't be missing out on a career and this will start off my career. I couldn't ignore the passion just because it was hard to write the essays. So I finished them, had my interviews and then like magic I was going to Boston! Thank goodness, I know it was the right decision.

The book this time is:
My point.....and I Do Have One (Ellen Degeneres)
Can I just tell you that I love love love Ellen! I wish I was her! She's funny, but her comedy has a great underlying message and she really makes people want to get up and dance! I love it! Can someone please get me tickets to her show? I would be forever grateful! :)

A nice day

2008-05-31T21:04:00.000-07:00

I went to work today.
It was a nice day.
I got called in early,
I went and played operator.
I went back to clerical.
I got a lot accomplished.

Sometimes I wonder why I care.
I care that there are call-ins.
I care that there are a lot of punch corrections.
I get excited when there is no one on compliance.
I care whether or not we make sales.
I care how many days we have worked safe.

Do I want to care about these things?
Not really,
and yet I do.
Have I become a dedicated retail worker?
Have I started to care for a company that does not really care about me?
YES! WHY?

It's all because I care about the world I live in.
I want to be successful in whatever I do.
It's that value that was instilled in me from little on.
Stupid family upbringing!
Stupid Catholic education!
Stupid college education!

There are more important things in the world to care about.
I've decided to care about them.
I've decided to let the little things go.
I will still be a dedicated worker,
but I won't let it all go to my head.
I have to stand on my own.

I am my own person!

The book this time is:
A Light in the Attic (Shel Silverstein)
He seriously writes the best poems, I don't care if they are for children! I'm a child at heart! :)

Size what?

2008-05-27T21:32:00.000-07:00

I went shopping the other day. I am not a skinny girl...there is no way of getting around that. I am comfortable with myself. I'm not exactly plus size, but there is no way I'm extra extra large either. Here's my thought, why are stores suddenly changing the sizing of plus sizes? I'm not usually a Maurice's shopper, but my friend wanted to go in so we did. I saw a sign out front that said now carrying plus sizes. This was my thought.....so clothes that are the real size that they say they are? I'm sorry, XL's are not extra large! So the "plus sizes" are in the back of the store, and first of all the clothes are disgusting, they are just huge bags that hang over you. Is that really plus size? No! Also there is this chart which helps you decide your size. The chart said, 1=16-18W, 2=20=22W, and so on. Are you trying to make me feel better so that I can say I'm a size 1! That's a little pathetic. Why are we so scared of the sizes that we really are? I'm happy with myself, could I stand to lose weight? Yes! But why, because society tells me I'm not the ideal figure, right..... Maybe I like being XXL! At least I don't lie about my size and pretend that I'm a size one. Why can't I have a shirt that shows I have a body? I would rather not wear a flowery printed bag (Thank you very much Maurice's, but I think I'm going to stick with my XXL figure!)

The book this time is:
Fat and Proud (Charlotte Cooper)

P.S. I swear I'm going to keep up with blogging. I know all three people who are reading this miss my rants! :)

High School!

2008-03-25T20:26:00.000-07:00

Okay part two of my teachers!
I will not go through all my high school teachers, just the ones that were great or funny or crazy!

Ms. Hupfer-Riedel- my TAC teacher, or for you non-Pius-ers, my homeroom teacher. Loved her dearly. She was crazy and always wanted to do crazy things during TAC, like TAC olympics, but she cared about as a TAC and paid attention to us. She was a chemistry teacher, so she helped me with my chemistry, which was great. (I still hate chemistry though)

Mr. Kangas- by far the best teacher at Pius! He was awesome!. I had him for AP U.S. History, which was great because he loved history so he went really slow. We talked about the Civil War for like 2 months! Good times! Plus, my best friend Gosia was in my class and he let us talk to each other in class. I always got B's on the tests. Great class! And he let us watch part of Newsies! :)

Ms. Frikovich- the first day of class she told us to call her Ms. Fuck-a-bitch! Ha , a tad innapproiate at a Catholic school.....whatever. She was fun, but she challenged me like no other English teacher I've had. She knew I was half-assing her class and she called me on it. Never had a english teacher do that. I always did good in English. She was good, but I didn't like her methods all that much.....everyone has a C until you earn a better grade....annoying. I wrote a crappy play in her Creative Writing class, wish I had more time to write it, now I have tons of ideas for a play. :)

Jay- my physics teacher, who I called by his first name (he didn't give consent, I just did it) so I can't remember his last name. He was a hoot. We watched 5 seconds of Titanic in class so we could measure how long it took the guy to fall who hit the propeller, so we could calculate his velocity (as if that movie was accurate to how long it took the guy to hit the propeller). He made us watch the videos of a college physics professor, so he didn't have to teach. Good times....I learned nothing, and somehow got a B in the class.

Bonnie- I actually had consent to call her by her first name, my choir teacher. Scary and amazing, although from a previous post, you can read how I felt about her by senior year. Plus a teacher should never call me "Little Dix" on the first day of class, just because I have older sisters. SO EMBARASSING!

Ms. McCann- my communuications, Modes of Lit, and British Lit teacher! So much fun! She let me talk to Gosia and Ryan in class, and she liked my writing style, plus we watched movies all the time. We got to watch the whole Pride and Prejudice movie (the 5 hour BBC version) in class. I think I was the only one that enjoyed it, though.

Mr. Witte- my Pius dad! I loved him! He was one of the Campus Ministers and was awesome. Always willing to sit down and talk with you. He always made time for me during the day and went out of his way to see how I was doing.

Mr. McCauly- My Great Thinkers in the Church teacher! Awesome! My favorite quote...."Hello children of God" I learned so much from him. He taught us some of my now favorite Saints. :)

That's it for now.....next is college! Isn't this fun?

The book this time is:
Ramona books (Beverly Clearly) I love them, even though I am too old for them. They make me smile, plus they remind me of when I was Ramona's age :)

My Teachers

2008-03-11T18:43:00.000-07:00

I thought I would do a little reminiscing about the teachers that I've had through the years. Some were great, others were just plain weird, and some were crazy and taught me more than I thought possible.

Kindergarten- Mrs. Bauxbaum
She was a nice teacher. I remember singing songs about "Mr. M" and "Ms. A" and she would read stories to us. There are two particular instances that stand out in my mind. On my birthday I wore my favorite candy cane stripe dress. I even had candy cane tights that went along with the dress. I was so excited that it was my birthday. Mrs. Bauxbaum gave us papers to put in our backpacks and give to our parents. I got a paper cut putting them in my backpack. I raised my hand and asked to go to the nurse, but she told me I was being a baby and wouldn't let me go. The other instance happened at snack time. I hated milk, especially from the cartons so I wouldn't drink it. Mrs. Bauxbaum made me sit under the easel the rest of the day. She even let all the other kids leave after school. My sister came to find me because I wasn't with the rest of the Kindergartners, drank my milk and I got to go home. I thought those were weird punishments. At least my sister helped me :)

1st-2nd Grade- Mrs. Meinholz, Mrs. Lemorand, and Mrs Hemple
I loved Mrs. Meinholz. She really believed in my ability as a student and because of her I became a confident reader. Mrs. Lemorand had a great method for teaching addition and subtraction. Have a contest with the other students that involves getting an M&M if you were right. Mrs. Hemple was nice, but kind of boring, she was the science teacher and maybe that's why to this day, I don't like science.

3rd-4th Grade- Sister Margaret Anne, Sister Ruth Ann, and Mrs. Kopp
Oh the stories I have that involve Sister Margaret Anne. She would make us get up in class and randomly do the chicken dance. She had a rolling overhead of transparency to teach us everything from math to art. She taught us the Jesse Tree (the genealogy of Jesus). She made us have jump rope day on the playground that involved her big box of jump ropes and everyone no matter what jumping rope at recess. She even told us that she was married........to God. It scared the crap out of me, but now I understand. :) Sister Ruth Ann was great. She liked me and taught us spelling and grammar. Two things I am now pretty good at. Mrs. Kopp was nice. She made us write Mysteries and build log cabins. It was fun. She did start to notice that I wasn't applying myself because I wasn't handing in my homework. She talked to my sisters and then to my parents. It made me work harder, but I didn't think that she needed to get my sisters in on it.

5th Grade- Mrs. Gableman
This was the year that I transferred from St. Rita to Holy Apostles. Oh what a crazy year. I enjoyed it a lot. Mrs. Gableman played a huge Xylophone. She made us sing all 5 versus of the Star Spangled Banner and she would wheel it down to the church when we had mass. She also taught us about the Civil War and let me bring in my American Girl doll from the Civil War era (Addy) She read all the Addy books out loud to us in class. How fun that must have been for the boys :) She also didn't want to correct the work herself so we would have to switch tests or homework with someone else and she would call out all the answers. She also made us call out our scores on homework and tests so she could get them into her grade book right away. Quite embarrassing if you got a bad score.

6th-8th Grade- Mrs. Coxey, Mrs. Canning, Ms. Chause, Mrs. Tillison, Mrs. Fare, and Mrs. Chipman
Oh middle school at Holy Apostles......we learned a lot, but had crazy teachers. Mrs. Coxey taught Language Arts, and I learned everything about grammar and spelling that I needed to know for the rest of my school career from her. She liked to call people delinquents, and she had a Dead Word Cemetery, which were overused words that we couldn't use in papers. She also told Gosia that she was a bad influence, which is so not true, but still makes me laugh to this day. Mrs. Canning was weird. She loved Ancient Egypt. It's all we did in 6th grade. She taught Social Studies. She made us copy word for word notes from the board and then made us memorize the notes for tests. We also wasted time every Monday by getting a new seating chart for the week. Ms. Chause was awesome! She taught science and made us do Science Fair every year by ourselves. We had to do the projects and give speeches. It was so much work. She also thought she was hearing laughing in the class when no one was talking. She liked to threaten us with quizzes on chapters when we were being too loud, but we did fun things like Rocket Day. We made our own model rockets and got to blast them off. So much fun! Mrs. Tillison was cool. She taught us opp-opp to help us add and subtract negative numbers. Funny thing though, when I got to high school my algebra teacher made me stop doing it. :( Mrs. Fare was crazy! She made us memorize the family tree in the Bible from Adam and Eve to Jesus. She would give us a blank sheet with lines and we had to fill in all the names that came in between them. She also made us watch Jesus of Nazareth every year, which was crazy. She would give us tests that involved exact lines from the movie. On Monday mornings she would give us mass quizzes to see which of us had gone or paid attention to mass that weekend. Crazy! Mrs. Chipman was by far one of the worst teachers I have ever had. She not only pulled me out into the hallway and yelled at me, but she did it so everyone in the class could hear what was going on. She tried to hold me hostage at school because she found white-out in my assignment notebook. She also made us do these Book Reports that had to be so exactly done that you would only get a good grade if you followed the sample that she gave in class. :(

I will get to high school tomorrow. Hope you have enjoyed this tidbit into my life. The book this time is:
Digital Fortress (Dan Brown) It's so interesting. Kind of creepy that it foreshadows some things that are already happening.

They love me!

2008-03-04T15:34:00.000-08:00

So I went to work today as always and I'm sitting down at my desk....that's right....I have a desk (it's not officially mine, but it's my place to work when I'm there). Anyways, Heather is one of the managers and she says that during the manager meeting yesterday she recognized me for being a great team member and being happy and excited while at work. Then later that day one of the managers in training pulled me aside and gave me a card because she recognized that I'm great at helping guests in the store and that I am cheerful while at work. It was great to hear that I make people smile when I am there. It's my mission in life to make people smile and if I can do it at a place like Target, where customers are soooooo annoying, then I think I actually have a talent for making people smile, which makes me smile! Yay! It's a scary thing when you fit really well with a company and you get paid so little, but I don't want to quit. Not yet anyway, I love all the people I work with and I'd miss them.

In other news Brett Farve retired today. Which does not make me as sad as some other Packer fans. I love him dearly, but I think it was time for him to go. He knows what is best and he really has given his all to the Packers. I will miss him, but I'm excited for the new quarterback because maybe he will be a superstar like Brett. Besides, I don't think Brett will walk away from football forever. He'll be an announcer or something cool like that. Maybe he'll have his own show. Then we can come to love him even more. Oh Brett, you make me happy!

I want to have my own show. I think it would be really fun, and I'm a fun person so therefore it would be a fun show. Maybe I could call it something cool like "Shut up! That's so exciting!" It's one of my favorite phrases. I also think being on the radio would be fun. I am fun, but there are a lot of serious issues that I am passionate about. Having a show would show my fun side and my serious side, and show that I am somehow able to balance the two.

Topic for next blog: My best and worst teachers of all time! It's going to be a good one so keep a look out for it!

The book this time is: The Polar Express (Chris Van Allsburg) It's one of my favorite books because I wish I could actually go on a train to the North Pole and meet Santa and hear the bell. Read it! It makes you feel good.

Avenue Q is AMAZING!!!!

2008-03-02T00:07:00.001-08:00

I went to see Avenue Q last night and let me tell you that it is amazing! It's a parody of Sesame Street for adults, and some of the songs are "The Internet is for Porn, If you were gay. So funny! I think that if you get a chance you should go see it. I went with my mother and she loved it. The show is really funny, but has a lot of serious undertones it it. And they have TV's that play the cartoons like they have on Sesame Street. I've had the songs in my head all day. "If you were gay......that's be okay "The internet is really really great.......for porn!" Go see it!

I know it's been a seriously long time, but here are my updates. I got a promotion at Target and now am working as the HR clerical, which means I do schedules, punch corrections, and ordering supplies. It pays .50 more an hour, which is not much, but a raise nonetheless. I also am employee of the month. I know exciting! :) I got a free CD out of it (Juno Soundtrack), which was good, and I'm glad that the team recognizes the work that I do.

I also was cleaning and I came across something that I wrote my junior year of high school. It was in 2001, so like 6 1/2 years ago. I think it's good. It was for my Women's Voices in Literature class.

Daddy's Girl

Character: Sandra Marcus
(A sunny Saturday morning, around 9:00. She is in pajamas, a robe, and slippers. She is 38 years old. She sits in a small kitchen, drinking coffee. She's looking into her coffee as she talks.)

Well
um
I was born
on
the eighteenth of February
1962.

It was a rainy day
in fact,
it was pouring, when my mother went into labor.

They had some time getting to the hospital.

anyway

My dad was convinced I was a boy,
but uh-oh

Surprise!!!

I was a girl.

I think
in a way
I was a blessing.

My mom grew up with two brothers
and my dad was an only child
so that's how I became
Daddy's little girl.

He loved me
he really loved me.

I was a tomboy
you know
the uh
baseball
wait I mean softball.

I really loved softball

It was great being at bat
and being able to whack
well
excuse me
there's really no other way to say it.

I uh
I whacked the shit out of it.

It felt so good!

I think that's the reason
I was never that close
to my mom.

Softball was my out.

If someone made fun of me at school
I whacked the ball.

I never told my mom,
I hit the ball instead.

It was so satisfying
but
there were certain things that softball couldn't fix
then I told my dad.

I think my mom
resented that
that
special relationship
that I had with my dad.

She just didn't understand
I was Daddy's girl.

He loved me
and I loved him.

END

Let me know what you think. I thought it was pretty darn good for a junior in high school. I don't remember what the assignment was, but I had to write that for some reason.

The book this time is: My Point...and I Do Have One (Ellen Degeneres) It's random and funny.

Okay so seriously a long time!

2008-01-27T16:31:00.000-08:00

I know it's been forever since I've written. I graduated! Yay! I passed all my classes and then spent Christmas at home with mi familia! It was awesome because my sisters came home and we spent a lot of time together. It's weird how when I was little I thought I wanted my sisters to move out because they were annoying, and now I miss them like crazy. I only get to see them twice a year and it's too little of a time. I can't believe how fast my childhood went. I still remember building tents with my sisters out of blankets and yard sticks, and bringing up all the toys and games from the basement and setting them up in the living room and playing store. We had so much fun when we were younger.

Another thing that I've realized is that working at Target sucks! People are so damn annoying. I can't believe the way they treat me and the store. They pick something up and then decide they don't want it so they put it someplace else in the store. Are you that lazy that you can't bring it up to the front and tell them that you don't want it? And thank you for asking me questions when I'm in the middle of lifting something heavy up onto the shelf. Like I can really stop everything I'm doing to help you.

I'm starting to realize that I don't have everything together, which is okay, but hard. I thought I knew what I wanted to do after college and know I'm not so sure. I just have to sit down and take some time for myself to figure out what is best to for. I'll come up with a new blog topic in a few days and I shall either bore you to tears or make you laugh! I'm going to the laugh!

The book this time is:
The Secret (Rhonda Byrne)
It's amazing! Read it and live it!

Product Placement

2007-12-09T16:17:00.000-08:00

I was watching the Biggest Loser the other day (one of my favorite shows) and I couldn't help but notice the number of not even subtle product placements. From Extra gum, to some brand of marinade, to Ziplock bags, to Nabisco 100 Calorie snacks, to Aquafina water, to SUBWAY! It's all over. There is no need for commercials on the show because the commercials are built into the show. I love the show, but it getting really annoying. I mean when the trainer tells the people that when they are hungry they chew a piece of Extra gum to suppress their hunger is bullshit! BULLSHIT I TELL YOU! I then realized the product placement in all the shows that I watch. Like Project Runway, and damn Loreal and Tresseme, and the Blue-Fly accessories wall. And don't even get me started on America's Next Top Model, I don't even know why I watch the show anymore. I hate Tyra and the stupid shit those girls do. DUMB!! And yet I'm still addicted. It's even on regular shows like Ugly Betty and Desperate Housewives, and Gossip Girl and Reaper. Stop it! As if I don't have enough advertising in my life to begin with and then there is even more when I watch TV than just the commercials. Argh!!

Let's put them together! Annoying!

Anyway Graduation is 5 days away! Yay!!!! I just have to get through until Wednesday and then everything will be golden. Say a prayer or send positive energy my way. I'm going to graduate and then watch out World!

The book this time is:
Even Cowgirls Get the Blues (Tom Robbins)

Here's my question

2007-11-20T09:14:00.000-08:00

Last week I hadn't been feeling that good. I was extremely tired and I felt sick, I also had no appetite, after feeling like this for about a week, and missing some classes, I went to Health Services on our campus. The only things they could come up with after taking my temperature and blood pressure is that

a.) I was pregnant (okay not a possibility, unless God decided to make me the next Mary)
b.) I was depressed (um......I've been depressed before I know what it feels like. They were like, well it comes in different forms, Hello! I know when I'm happy and when I'm not. It's not normal for me to feel this way, hence going to the doctor)
c.) I have acid reflux disease (Okay seriously! I do not have Acid reflux, Is it that hard to say, maybe you have the flu, even though you don't have a temperature?)

How is it okay for Health Services to assume that because I'm a college girl that I'm pregnant? It's not!

I then got tips on eating healthy because after asking me what I ate in the past two days, even though I told her that I didn't have an appetite, she assumed that I wasn't eating healthy. Right.....I eat vegetables at every meal when I'm well.

So thanks Health Services for putting me at ease about my conception of a child without sex, my depression screening, remember it comes in different forms, and my non existent acid reflux disease. You have really made me feel like you are fully capable of diagnosing me.

P.S. Just because I'm a college girl does not mean when I have an upset stomach and nausea that I am pregnant. Thank You!

The book this time is:
Your basic sex ed book that tells you about how a girl gets pregnant. Maybe Health Services needs to read that book!

You must watch and read....

2007-11-15T18:27:00.000-08:00

If you are not watching Kid Nation, you are missing out. The basic premise of the show is to put 40 kids in a ghost town called Bonanza from the 1800's. The town is run completely by kids to show that kids can make decisions and are smart enough to run their own town. It's so funny! These kids are conceited, fun, quirky, and annoying! It's one of the most entertaining hours on television. The coucil which is four kids from the town decides important decsions for the town and decides who wins a gold star (20,000 dollars). The kids compete in showdowns to see who will make the most money and have to do the least work. (I like that we are making it like the real world, you'd think things would be a little fairer in a town run by kids, but not so much, although it was adults who decided on the paychecks). Here is a link to a blog about the show. http://www.collegehumor.com/article/tag:the-morning-after-kid-nation It's so funny! P.S. Jared is the best kid on the show. If you want to see whole episodes of the show, you can watch them on cbs.com I highly recommend this. It's a good time.

Here's Jared, my favorite! They did a talent show and he was performing a monologue from Hamlet

These are the kids particpating in a showdown

I'm just going to come out and say it.....

2007-11-15T17:28:00.000-08:00

I'm pro-choice. I've decided to stop caring if you are going to judge me for that. I am not a murderer. I do not think that all unborn babies deserve to die. I am just on the side of women who live in a country that does not support single and working mothers. A child that is unwanted lives a sad life, because whether or not they were told, they can tell that they were not wanted. I don't think there is automatic motherly love once the baby is born. Some women do not have maternal instinct and because of that the child does not deserve to live a life in which they know that their mother does not love them. Adoption is not always the easy answer because adoption is expensive and carrying a child to full term is hard, People who are looking into adoption are also picky and want the perfect looking child. If you are a child that was not adopted, then you live your life in foster care. That's not a good life either. To never feel like you fully belong to a family because no one wanted to permenantly keep you. I don't think I could handle that.

The other thing is that people think that if abortion is outlawed its going to go away. Not true! Women had abortions when they were illegal and got really bad infections and died. That's not promoting a life culture either. I don't like abortion, and I don't think I would ever have one, but I don't know that for sure, and I don't think that taking away access to abortions is the answer to the problem.

These opinions have not just come out of nowhere. I've done research and come to the conclusion that this is the best option for me. If you are pro-life then I completely respect and understand your position. Please do not judge me and pretend like you know everything about me after reading this. I'm not a one-sided person. I think a lot about things before I form an opinion on them, If you want to have a respectful and peaceful conversation about this, I would be more than willing. Thanks for reading,

I'm recomending a video:
When Abortion was Illegal (it's a documentary, not sure on the year)

TEC was interesting......

2007-11-12T13:56:00.000-08:00

So TEC was this weekend and it was good, but a very different vibe than the previous TECs that I've worked and been on. It was hard leading it because it was a lot of stress and I didn't get a lot of sleep. The lack of sleep was not only because I went to bed later than I should've, but also because it's a bitch to sleep on a hard floor. It was carpeted, but no padding. It was the same as sleeping on a hardwood floor. I'm not sure the TECites actually enjoyed the retreat. I know for a fact that some of them did not have fun and I know that I can't force someone to have fun, but I still feel partially responsible. I don't know how I feel about leading. I enjoyed it, but at the same time, it was an awkward position to be in. The retreat is through St. Mary's, although it's for Winona State students too. The thing is because St. Mary's is smaller than Winona State and the majority of the people on the retreat are from St. Mary's, it makes it awkward for us Winona State kids. I felt honored to have been asked to lead, but it was one of the hardest things I've ever done.

It was a good weekend and I loved spending time with people from St. Mary's. I just think to make the retreat less awkward for Winona State students, there has to be more Winona State students there. I honestly think a lot of Winona State students would go, but the retreat is not really advertised here, and the recruiting from Winona State was left to me. I tried hard, but I'm only one person and I have a ton of my own stuff to take care of. The retreat was good, just different and not super hyped up like the other TECs that I've been on. I think this is good, because not everyone does the jumping around and being siliy thing. I still think the TECites got something out of the weekend, even the people who said they didn't have fun. So there!

Here's a picture of my co-leader and advisor.

The book this time is:
Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery)
I love that Anne is different and she embraces it! That's my goal, to always be myself.

Freakin out a little.....

2007-11-08T14:04:00.000-08:00

So this weekend I'm leading a retreat and I do not at all feel prepared. We as leaders had organized binders but, we are still freaking out over the little things. Everything is being put together at the last minute. We have people that signed up for the retreat backing out, which then means that we have to do some rearranging. It's just a lot of work. Last night the internet went out on our campus from 9:30pm-4am. Which meant that I couldn't email the people that I needed to, and I couldn't get the work done that I needed to. Blah!!!! The weekend will be great, I'm just nervous. After tonight I will feel a lot better about it. I hope! :)

I recommending a movie:
Little Miss Sunshine (it's hilarious!)

I'm feeling reflective....

2007-11-03T23:50:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when I'm alone I sit back and look at my life. It's been a good one. Not that I'm dying anytime soon (God willing), but I'm satisfied with my life so far. I have an awesome family who put up with me when I was a total and complete brat. I've discovered who my real friends are and seen what it's like to have friends that are not really friends. I have wonderful sisters who have been great role models for me. There was a point in my life when I was very unhappy. I just felt so alone, like no one trusted me to make my own decisions. I was given the chance to be responsible, and I've discovered that I'm pretty darn capable of making my own decisions, not that I don't need help every once in a while. I wonder what my life would be like if I have never gone to Winona State, what if I had gone to culinary school? I would have been done with school 2 years ago, and I'd be making a living by being a chef someplace.

I really wanted to be a chef in high school. I honestly thought that's what I was supposed to be. I think I would have made a great chef, but I don't think I'd be as happy as I am now. Going to Winona State has given me a lot of confidence. I learned how to do public speaking and I've learned so much about becoming a successful activist. I'm ready to go out into the world and make a difference. I don't think I'll become a huge icon or anything, but I believe I will make a difference in someone's life. I think I've already made some differences in the lives of my friends. They sure have made a difference in mine. I'm amazed at the life I've had. Growing up with the family that I did and even though I had my struggles, I'm glad that it was my parents and sisters that were there for me. Thanks. I hope you've enjoyed my reflection.

The book this time is
Anatomy of the Spirit (Caroline Myss)

Is anyone out there?

2007-11-02T22:39:00.000-07:00

I feel like no one is reading my blog. I guess it doesn't matter that much, but if you are reading then this is for you. Things are crazy right now. I'm trying so hard to get all my stuff done. I feel like I can't catch up. I have so much homework to do, and all the actvities that I'm involved in are eating away at my time. Tonight was a great night, because I stopped doing my crazy schedule and took a night off. I watched some Gilmore Girls and knitted, and then I went to my friend Kassie's to watch Whale Rider. It's one of my favorite movies. I can't believe I'm graduating from college in about a month. It's crazy! I always dreamed of getting to this point of my life, but now it's so close. I'm trying really hard to get over senioritis, so that it doesn't consume my life. I working on the next step in my life, hopefully it will be something exciting.

I'm recomending a movie this time:
Whale Rider (Awesome, Awesome movie!)

STUPID COMPUTERS!!!

2007-11-01T19:26:00.000-07:00

Today everything was fine and I went to take a nap at 2:30 because I pretty much stayed up all night and I was really tired. I then got up 2 hours later and tried to check me email. My computer was frozen so I turned it off and then tried to turn it on again. It wouldn't go to the login screen. I tried at least 5 times, and then I decided to go to Tech Support. Let me jut tell you that I hate, hate, hate tech support. They are mean, and act like it's your fault that your computer started acting up. The guy then tried to turn on my computer and it wouldn't, so he took my harddrive and tried to out it in a new computer. Didn't work. So he said he would give me a new harddrive, and transfer all the stuff from my old harddrive. Well, apparently my harddrive is a piece of shit because it wouldn't transfer my stuff to the new one. The guy was like "there is nothing I can do, so I guess you lost your stuff!". Um....Thanks man, for feeling bad for me! Not! Argh!!! He was like, did you back your stuff up? No, that was stupid on my part. I actually thought I could rely on a computer. Dammit!!! It's fine, I actually didn't lose that much. I'm just annoyed with the whole situation. Anyways.........

The book this time is:
Wicked:The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West (Gregory Maguire)

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T15:02:00.000-07:00

Since today is Halloween I thought I give you an alternate universe. I'm giving homage to Gloria Steinem! Enjoy!

If Men Could Menstruate A Political Fantasy by Gloria Steinem (First published in the October 1978 issue of Ms. Magazine, this has become a cult classic among feminists.) Steinem is using both satire and hyperbole to make a point (highlighted in yellow) which is substantiated by a large body of research. -Dr. Sefkow (my psych of women professor)

A white minority of the world has spent centuries conning us into thinking that white skin makes people superior - even though the only thing it really does is make them more subject to ultraviolet rays and to wrinkles. Male human beings have built whole cultures around the idea that penis-envy is "natural" to women - though having such an unprotected organ might be said to make men vulnerable, and the power to give birth makes womb-envy at least as logical.

In short, the characteristics of the powerful, whatever they may be, are thought to be better than the characteristics of the powerless - and logic has nothing to do with it.

What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?

The answer is clear - menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:

Men would brag about how long and how much.

Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed-for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties.

Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts.

Sanitary supplies would be federally funded and free. (Of course, some men would still pay for the prestige of commercial brands such as John Wayne Tampons, Muhammad Ali's Rope-a-dope Pads, Joe Namath Jock Shields - "For Those Light Bachelor Days," and Robert "Baretta" Blake Maxi-Pads.)

Military men, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("men-struation") as proof that only men could serve in the Army ("you have to give blood to take blood"), occupy political office ("can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priest and ministers ("how could a woman give her blood for our sins?") or rabbis("without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean").

Male radicals, left-wing politicians, mystics, however, would insist that women are equal, just different, and that any woman could enter their ranks if she were willing to self-inflict a major wound every month ("you MUST give blood for the revolution"), recognize the preeminence of menstrual issues, or subordinate her selfness to all men in their Cycle of Enlightenment.

Street guys would brag ("I'm a three pad man") or answer praise from a buddy ("Man, you lookin' good!") by giving fives and saying, "Yeah, man, I'm on the rag!" TV shows would treat the subject at length. ("Happy Days": Richie and Potsie try to convince Fonzie that he is still "The Fonz," though he has missed two periods in a row.) So would newspapers.(SHARK SCARE THREATENS MENSTRUATING MEN. JUDGE CITES MONTHLY STRESS IN PARDONING RAPIST.) And movies. (Newman and Redford in "Blood Brothers"!)

Men would convince women that intercourse was more pleasurable at "that time of the month." Lesbians would be said to fear blood and therefore life itself - though probably only because they needed a good menstruating man.

Of course, male intellectuals would offer the most moral and logical arguments. How could a woman master any discipline that demanded a sense of time, space, mathematics, or measurement, for instance, without that in-built gift for measuring the cycles of the moon and planets - and thus for measuring anything at all? In the rarefied fields of philosophy and religion, could women compensate for missing the rhythm of the universe? Or for their lack of symbolic death-and-resurrection every month?

Liberal males in every field would try to be kind: the fact that "these people" have no gift for measuring life or connecting to the universe, the liberals would explain, should be punishment enough.

And how would women be trained to react? One can imagine traditional women agreeing to all arguments with a staunch and smiling masochism. ("The ERA would force housewives to wound themselves every month": Phyllis Schlafly. "Your husband's blood is as sacred as that of Jesus - and so sexy, too!": Marabel Morgan.) Reformers and Queen Bees would try to imitate men, and pretend to have a monthly cycle. All feminists would explain endlessly that men, too, needed to be liberated from the false idea of Martian aggressiveness, just as women needed to escape the bonds of menses-envy. Radical feminist would add that the oppression of the nonmenstrual was the pattern for all other oppressions ("Vampires were our first freedom fighters!") Cultural feminists would develop a bloodless imagery in art and literature. Socialist feminists would insist that only under capitalism would men be able to monopolize menstrual blood...

In fact, if men could menstruate, the power justifications could probably go on forever.

If we let them.

It's been a while

2007-10-30T21:53:00.000-07:00

Okay folks, it's been a long time since my last post. To make up for this, I plan to post a new blog every day this week. I've been crazy busy lately. I'm co-leading a retreat at St. Mary's University which is really cool, but a ton of work. I have to give a talk on commitment which has proven itself to be a hard task. I'm talking about having a learning disability and how I've overcome it to be successful in my life. I never really realized how angry I was before I accepted the fact that I had this disability. I was angry at myself because there wasn't anything I could do to fix it, and I was angry at God for giving me this obstacle in my life. I was also angry at my family for trying to help me. I'm an independent person who likes to figure things out on my own. I know that I need other people to help me, but view it as a personal accomplishment when I can figure out something without any help from someone. I've worked through this anger, and finally come to accept that I have this learning disability. I'm still smart and capable, and gosh darn it, I will be successful in my life! It's hard to share my commitments and how I came to have them because I don't really talk about my commitments that much. I know what they are and I committ to them. It's hard to express how committed I am to certain things, because from an outsider's view I don't look that committed. Being committed to something does not always have a physical representation, I know in my heart that I am fully and completely committed. If you would like a preview of my talk, I really need to practice, so give me a call.

The book this time is:
Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)

Not Fair!

2007-10-14T14:14:00.000-07:00

I got kicked out of a bar last night. The thing is I wasn't even that drunk. I wasn't being obnoxious. I wasn't falling over drunk or anything. I'm not the type of person to get kicked out of a bar or any place. I really think the bartender was asserting his manliness and kicked us out because we were women. I think that if I was a man in the same situation that we wouldn't have been kicked out. I didn't put up a fight. I started tearing up because that's what I do in an unfair situation. I wanted another drink and the bartender cut me off. I didnt yell or scream or anything. I just let it go. Then he told me I was intoxicated and I needed to leave. A girl across the bar told me that I had been annoying the bartender all night and I should just leave. My friend Amanda stood up for mr and then the bartender told her to leave as well. I just gave in and walked out the door. I can't believe it's my last semester in Winona and I got kicked out of a bar. It makes it worse because I think I would feel better about the situation if there were really reasons that I should have been kicked out. I really think the bartender was being a sexist pig and just asserting his manliness in front of the people that were there. I'm going to call the manager because it's not fair. I obviously wasn't that drunk if I can remember everything that happened. Soooo never going back there again!

The book this time is
Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)
I love it and it's a classic!

Ignorant Americans

2007-10-07T21:44:00.000-07:00

Today I went to Rushford to help with Flood Relief, yes these people still need help even though it's been 2 months, and we cleaned a big field of dirt/mud. It was hot and muggy outside, and we had to pick up the garbage because this area had become a dumping ground for the things in people's homes that was ruined in the flood. Anyways, to make a long story short, it was hot and sweaty, but we pretty much cleared the field. After we finsished cleaning we went inside the flood relief center to process and talk about our work day, and a man and his wife that was working on relief was there to talk to us. We compared this flood to the floods caused by hurricanes, and then he asked us if any of us had experienced a natural disaster. One girl raised her hand and started talking about a tornado and suddenly the conversation was switched to talking about a hurricane. He was just not listening. One of the student volunteers was from Kenya and the guy asked her to compare the floods here to some things that are going on in Kenya, and then he made this huge arogant assumption that I wanted to slap him for. The girl was talking about the bombings in 1998 to the US Embassy in Kenya, and then he asked about the homes in the small villges in Kenya. He asked if people in Kenya even had their own rooms. He was assuming that because she was from Kenya she lived in a small village and did not have her own room. He assumed the fact that she did not have her own room that if a flood happened in Kenya the people would be more devastated there, than the people are here, because they lived in a small village? Um Hello sir! Just because this girl is from Kenya does not automatically mean that she lives in a small village and doesn't have a room of her own! He would ask her questions and then didn't even listen to her answer, he just answered them himself. If you want to learn about someone from another culture, you have to actually listen to their repsonses on the questions that you ask them. I was so frustrated that he just assumed she was from a small village. He was pretty much saying that all Kenyans are from small villages and there is no cilvilzation there. I know that I'm assuming, but if you had heard the way he was talking to her and then answering his own questions......argh!!! Don't be a stupid arogant American. Just because this girl is not from the US does not mean that she is less fortunate that you. I hate when people on campus assume that the International students are stupid and can't speak English. Um....hello! They wouldn't be able to go to school here is they couldn't speak English. Anyways, I had a good time helping with the flood relief, even though I was tired and dirty.

This is a picture from the floods that happened in Minnesota in August. This is what Rushford looked like during the flood.

I'm recommending an essay this time because it applies to the theme from this blog. Here it is!
White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack (Peggy McIntosh)

How can you be mad at the world?

2007-10-03T15:01:00.000-07:00

I'm kind of mad at the world right now. Things are not going my way. I'm too busy to enjoy my last semester of college. I feel like I can't get a leg up on my life. I'm graduating and I don't know what the next step is. I know what I like to do, but how do I make that into a career? I really enjoy public speaking. I like sharing the things that I've learned in life with other people, and seeing the look on their faces when I've made something click in their brains. I love making people laugh, the thing is, I don't know how I do it half the time. I want to make a mark on the world, but I dont know how big that mark is going to be. I want people to believe in me and me to believe in the power of myself. I'm a good person, who really cares about the world. Not only the planet, but the quality of life people are living on it. It's not good enough for us to stop global warming, or get rid of our reliance on oil, we have to think about the number of people that are living lives of despair. The world is not only for one person, it's for everyone to share, and if we keep going in the direction we are, the world will be no more. That's how you can be mad at the world. The world and I are trying to work out our issues. I can make this work, and I will make the world a better place, even if it is only for one person!

The book this time is:
Harry Potter (J.K. Rowling) It makes me feel better when I'm sad! All of them!

I need to get over this stuff....

2007-09-28T20:59:00.000-07:00

Last night I went out with some friends for dinner and while sitting and talking I realized something....I'm so not over what happened to me in high school. I was in high school 5 years ago, you think I'd be over it by now, but apparently I'm not. High school was not traumatic for me, in fact I had a great time. There were some instances with friends, but for the most part, I made good friends and have a lot of good memories. Here's the thing I'm not over....choir and theatre! My freshemen year I took Mixed Chorus because the is the choir that you are supposed to start in. The only reason I ever joined choir was so that I could be in Concert Choir, the highest choir in the school (minus Madrigals), so I suffered through Mixed, Treble Choir, and then Advanced Treble Choir because our choir director didn't want Concert Choir to be so big. She started Advanced Treble Choir because she didn't want to put all the girls that were in Treble Choir into Concert Choir, hence she made a new choir. Now I thought when I was a junior that I could go through one more year of choir without being in Concert Choir, so I put my time in and worked hard, even though I thought choir was kind of boring. Then at the end of my junior year, Bonnie (Choir Director) decides that she is going to make us go through auditions for Concert Choir, and I thought okay. Although I thought it was weird, because the year before she put all the girls that were going to be Seniors in Concert Choir. So I signed up for my audition, and decided that I should try out for Madrigals because I would have been mad at myself if I had not given it a chance. Well I got really nervous, and when I'm nervous I sing off key. In the audition they asked you your part, (I was a second soprano), but I had been a first soprano before, so I should have said that I was first soprano because they put a tape on with all the other parts except second sop and expected me to be able to sightsing my notes....yeah right! Well needless to say I messed up, but I figured I would still get into Concert Choir, well I didn't. I had to suffer through my senior year in a state of bitterness because although I had put my time in, and I'm not a terrible singer, I didn't get into Concert Choir. I was once again in Advanced Treble Choir. Which by the way, when I went to ask Bonnie why I didn't make Concert Choir, she told me that ATC was on the same level as Concer Choir, Bullshit! Then why wasn't I in Concert Choir?

Now theatre. I tried out for a lot of shows in my high school career, I was blessed to go to a school that did like nine shows a year, so my chances of making a show were pretty good. Well not so much. My freshmen year I tried out for West Side Story. I didn't make it. It was a longshot since there were usually only 3 freshmen in the shows and a ton of people tried out. (sidenote: My sister Angela was Maria, and she was awesome!). So I was not too upset that I didn't make it. I ended up trying out for the Student Play Festival, and I got in it! Yay! It was fun, and it was all student run so I got to know a lot of cool people that way. My sophomore year I tried out for Hamlet, which was an all female cast and there were going to be two different productions of it, I didn't make it. I wasn't that upset though because there were other oppertunities. Again I tried out for the Student Play Festival and made it again. Yay! I also tried out for Fame, and got in that as well! I was so excited, granted it was not up to the standards of other Pius shows, but it was so much fun! I thought that since I made Fame that I had my foot in the door and getting into the shows would be easier because the director knew me and what I was capable of. Well, scrap that theory. My junior year I tried out for Jesus Christ Superstar, and I had a bad audition, so I didn't make it. I was not prepared and forgot the words to my song. Not good! Then I tried out for The Foreigner and got called back, but didn't make the final cast. I was pretty upset because I thought I actually had a chnace of making it. Then I tried out for Jeckyl and Hyde, and again I didn't make it. I was starting to get pretty frustrated. Plus, my junior year there were two Student Play Festivals, and you'd think that I would have made them, or at least one, but no! I was pretty discouraged, but I kept trying my senior year, and I tried out for Les Miserables. Now I thought, hey I'm a senior, it's my last chance to be in a show, the cast was going to be huge, there were supposed to be like 60 people, so I thought hey as long as I have a solid audition, I'll make it. Well I didn't, and let me tell you I was very upset. The director did not stick to the usual 3 freshmen, there were 7, and there were kids in it too. I was bitter, I had a good audition. I didnt forget the words and I sang on key. There were apparently 60 other people in the school that were better than me, even though all I wanted to do was wave my flag in the background. I also tried out for the two student play festivals and didn't make those either. I then proceeded to try out for one more show, Dancing at Lugnasa, and I didn't make it. I was very discouraged, I gave up on being in a show my senior year, even though there was one more that I could've tried out for. I didn't because it would have meant that I would've had to skip prom.

Now I know this sounds craxy for me not to be over this, but this was all I dreamt about doing before I got to high school. I didn't think I'd make every show, but I thought I would be able to be in a show my senior year. I think Pius has great plays and musicals, and really wonderful choirs, but it's not fair that you have to be outstanding your freshmen year to be considered. I wasn't given a chance to grow and show that I had the potential to learn. Plus, it was high school, I should have been given a chance to explore my options and really find out what I was good at. There should have been a play that didn't cut people. I didn't want a lead role, all I wanted was to be in it. Choir was fun in the beginning, and then it got competitive and not fair. If you put in your time and sing on key, you should be able to move up the notches of choir. A choir is not good if it is made up of solo singers. I mean hello! Choirs sing together!

Writing this is a step in me getting over it. I've learned so much about myself in college, and it was not through choir and theatre. I don't need to say that I sang in the top choir and was in all the shows to be successful. So everything happens for a reason, I did get to hang aroundsome awesome friends my senior year, and would not have been able to do that as much had I been in the shows. I had a fun senior year, and I got to make good relationships with the teachers in the Campus Ministry Office, which helped me realize my passion in life. So I'm saying goodbye to my bitterness. I won't speak about being sad about choir and theatre anymore. That was high school and I'm not in high school anymore! Hooray! I can feel the bitterness leaving my body.

The book this time is:
That Takes Ovaries: Bold Females and Their Brazen Acts (Rivka Solomon)

Why am I like that?!?

2007-09-25T22:27:00.000-07:00

Lately I've realized that I do not take time out of my busy schedule to enjoy life. I tend to get so wrapped up in things that I get annoyed with the people who are appreciating life. Example: ever since high school I have not walked slow. I was trained in high school to walk fast because I only had four minutes to get to my locker on the third floor from the 5th floor and then proceed to my class on the 4th floor. I would get annoyed with students at Pius that walked too slow for me. I was not at all hostile towards them, but I would try to get around them so that I could continue on with my fast paced life. The thing that makes me laugh is that I was never late for class....even when I had to stop at my locker. I didn't even take the time to say hi to my friends because I had to get to my locker....I'm saddened by that. I could have made so many more friendships if I had slowed down and taken the time to appreciate that fact that I was in high school.

In college, I still find myself doing this. The funny thing is that, I now have at least 10 minutes between classes and a lot of the time have no reason to be rushed. Today after my last class, I found myself becoming annoyed with the kid in front of me that was walking slowly, and then I thought about it.....why am I in such a hurry? I have nowhere to be and gaining another 2 minutes of study time is not going to help me much in the long run. So I made a pact with myself to slow down and start enjoying life. I mean you only get to live it once......why not appreciate it? I don't want to be the person that says someday I'm going to do that, I'm going to be the person that says....I did that and now I'm doing this. Life goes by so fast and we as Americans forget to take time out and enjoy what we are doing.

This is something else that I find really important.....reflection. Living at home for 3 years by myself while my sisters were at college gave me a chance to be alone and really get to know myself. I didn't live in the shadow of my sisters, but when they left I was really able to get a chance to reflect on myself and who I was as a person. I still enjoy my alone time. It was hard for me to have a roommate in college because I missed my alone time. I am by no means a loner, but there are times when I just want to reflect on my life. It's okay to be alone and take the time to reflect on yourself....you really learn a lot about yourself. So the next time you find yourself hurrying off some place that you don't really need to be hurrying off to, take a step back and appreciate your life. This is something that I will continue to work on and eventually I will be able to fully appreciate my life.

The book this time is:
Walk Two Moons (Sharon Creech)

Some Interesting Facts

2007-09-21T13:38:00.000-07:00

These are some interesting facts from my Psych of Women book:
1. After more than 200 years of democracy, only 13 percent of U.S. Senators and 14 percent of members of the House of Representatives are women.
2. In the United States, women earn about seventy-four cents for every dollar earned by men.
3. The United Nations estimates that 100 million women worldwide are missing from the population--dead because, as females, they were unwanted.
4. One in four U.S. college students believe that the activities of married women should be limited to home and family (down from one in two in 1970).
5. Women have been heads of state in twenty-three countries around the world, yet in others they lack the basic human rights such as voting and going to school.
6. Women in the U.S. are far more likely than men to suffer from serious depression and eating disorders.
7. Less than 5 percent of the artists in New York's Metropolitan Museum collections are women, but 85 percent of the nude paintings are of females.

Just some food for thought....back to studying.......

The book this time is Nicke and Dimed (Barbara Ehrenreich)

Gym Class Woes

2007-09-20T22:59:00.000-07:00

Today I got to talking to someone about gym class or Phy Ed as it was called at Holy Apostles (Thanks Mr. S. It was called Phy Ed because the gym is the building, but the class is physical education), and I thought about my experiences in gym. Kindergarten through 2nd grade gym was fun. We played the games that had people in the middle, and then you had to try to run across the gym and reach the other side without getting tagged by one of the people in the middle. I also loved parachute day. This is the day that Mr. Dorlack brought out the parachute and we swayed it back and forth and had to run under it and do the crab crawl. Gym class was so much fun! But in 3rd grade we started actual sports, and I'm not the most athletic person so it was not much fun for me. I remember during football, running along the wall on the playground to make it look like I was doing something, but I had no idea what was going on. In 5th grade I was at a new school (Holy Apostles) and Phy Ed was started. Mr. S. would give us lectures on sports and then give us tests on them. (i.e. When was basketball invented? and where was it invented?) BTW, I still don't know the answers to those questions! Presidential Fitness Testing also came along with Phy Ed, and the dreaded mile. In 5th grade I was forced to run my first mile around the cemetary (yes, that's right a cemetary, because the road around it was a circle so we ran around the raod three times (apparently that was a mile). In fifth grade, I got a DNF which stands for did not finish (thanks for waiting 2 more minutes Mr. S.) and it 6th grade I finished it 11 minutes (I know that's terrible, but at least I finished it!) In 7th grade I got a 9:15 and in 8th 8:45? So at least I got better. Here's the question, what purpose does running the mile serve? I didn't learn anything except the fact that I hate running, and I hate it even more when I have to do it around a cemetary. What happened to gym class with the silly games? At least I was encouraged and had a good time. I agree with physical activity in school, but why did Mr. S. have to give us thoe stupid tests? and in 6th grade we had to write papers! Yes that right! Papers in Phy Ed! Haha.......I wrote mine on volleyball and got a D from Mr. S and an A- from the Language Arts teacher. I enjoyed gym class in high school, mainly because of Stro (Ms. Stromilla!) haha...line dancing with a woman who taught my mom when she was in high school! And roller-skating. Pius understood about fun activities. Don't humiliate kids because they are bad at sports, just encourage them to do physical activity and have fun. So ends my rant on gym class. Games in gym = fun, and presidential fitness tests and written tests = a horrid experience!

The book this time is:
Fast Food Nation (Eric Schlosser)

Ugly Betty!!

2007-09-17T14:00:00.000-07:00

So I have to give a huge hooray to America Ferrera because she won for best lead actress in a comedy series at the Emmy's last night. I love Ugly Betty, if you've never seen it you should start watching it. It's on Thursdays on ABC at 8/7 central. Betty is the assistant to Daniel Mead who is the Editor-in-chief of Mode Magazine. Betty is "ugly" on the outside, but doean't let that get in her way and manages to have the whole company loving her. It's a great show and shows that there is more to life than appearances. I'm so glad that the U.S. has accepted "Ugly Betty" because it's a positive show for kids to watch (on most occasions) and it shows that you don't have to be frightingly skinny and look like a doll in order to make an impact on the world. So I say watch the show.....or rent it because the first season is out on DVD. And if you like it, which I think you will, pass it on to your friends and tune in for the second season! :)

Book recomendation this time is:
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)

I forgot to recomend a book!

2007-09-13T21:02:00.000-07:00

I realized after all my ranting that I forgot to recomend a book, but this time I'm recomending a movie because it fits the topic and movies are inspirational as well. So here it is:
If these Walls Could Talk (Starring Demi Moore, Sissy Spacek, and Cher) Made in 1996 by HBO

Are you kidding me?

2007-09-13T20:36:00.000-07:00

Today on campus there were these Anti-choice protestors from Milwaukee (Don't ask me why there were all the way in Winona, I have no idea) that had huge posters, like 5 feet high and 3 feet wide posters, of aborted fetuses. They were handing out these pamplets about abortion and they even had young kids handing out pamplets. I respect someone's right to free speech, but was it necessary to get your kids involved? They don't really know what is going on. I mean there was a four year old handing out pamplets. They were screaming that abortion was immoral and that Planned Parenthood is evil. The pamplets said in big bold letters that "Planned Parenthood admits that abortion is the killing of a baby", well duh! Whoever said abortion was otherwise was very misinformed. On the pamplet it said, "most people think that abortion is the removal of some cells and tissue, but it's really the killing of a baby!" I don't know anyone who thinks that abortion is the removal of tissue and some cells. Bah! These people are missing the underlying problem. Abortion wouldn't be necessary if the fricken government took care of the people that can't afford to be pregnant and raise a child. These people think that if abortion was outlawed that it would stop happening. NEWSFLASH! Just because you outlow something doesn't mean it goes away. HELLO! Stealing is against the law, but it still happens! Abortion is more than a right or wrong moral issue. There are a lot of issues in the U.S. that need to be worked out before abortion will not be necessary. (On a side note, I didn't actually get the pamplet from one of the protestors, I picked it up off the ground because someone had gotten it and didn't want it.....isn't that an effective method? NOT! I kept my head down while I was passing them and wouldn't make eye contact) On a happy note, FORGE is planning a counter protest for next thursday at the same time of day to give the students at WSU another view on the issue. I'm not at all against people who are pro-life. I just think today was at a point where it went too far. If you are going to debate with someone, you have to be willing to listen to their side of the issue. It goes along with good debate ethics....otherwise it's not a fair argument, and I'm all for fair arguments.

In memory of a nose stud

2007-09-11T18:04:00.000-07:00

Last week while at home I caught a cold. My nose got all stuffed up and then my nose stud got infected. I took it out for a couple of days and the hole closed up. The only way to get the stud back in is to get it pierced again. I don't have the money to do that now so I'm saying goodbye to my nose stud. Sad, but true.

Goodbye Nose Stud
You served me well
It was a rebelious act that brought you about
I'd been thinking about doing it for four or five years
and I finally did

Goodbye nose stud
You brought me compliments
and a sparkle to my nose
I felt pretty with you around
and I still am without you

Goodbye nose stud
you will be remembered forever
Sometimes it feels like you are still there
but alas, you are not
Maybe someday I'll have a new nose stud
and the happy respect with stud and nose
will be brought together again

The recommended book this time is:
Body Outlaws (Rebecca Walker and Ophira Edut)

And because it is 9/11, I'm giving my tribute to the men and women whose lives were lost in the tragedy.

Flood Relief

2007-09-09T20:44:00.000-07:00

Right before school started in Winona there was some serious flooding in the area. Nothing happened to the school, but there are more than a hundred houses in the Winona area that are uninhabitable. Today some students volunteered to help the people in the area. I was assigned to a home in Minnesota City. The house was completely gutted out when we got there. It looked like they were in the building stages of the house with plywood floors and no dry wall. The owners had to completely start over on their house. It was so weird to think that your whole house could get ruined by a bunch of water. We cleaned out the basement and then we had to shovel rocks from the garden and powerwash them because they got covered in sewage from the flood. It was awesome to help someone, but it was a lot of work. At the end of the day we took a trip to the end of the road where it meets up with the Mississippi River. The water had washed out a train bridge and a road bridge and we were at least 40 feet above the river. Can you imagine the water coming that high? It also came in about a 6 hour span.

I was bothered by the fact that not a lot of upperclass people helped out with the flood relief. I know that we are busy and have a lot of work to do, but it was only one afternoon. I think that as we get older we tend to forget how to budget our time for other people. I think it's important to help out and get involved with the community that you live in. You as a community member have a voice and you should be able to make your voice heard. The best way to get your voice heard is to become involved. There were a lot of freshpeople there which was awesome to see. I know that some of them were required to be there because of Alcohol violations, so they had to do community service, but there was a good number of them that were there because they wanted to help. Another thing that bothered me was the people that signed up to come and made a commitment and then didn't show up. I think that is so irresponsible. They signed up for it voluntarily so why wouldn't you follow through with a committment. I didn't was to get up this morning, but I sucked it up because I made a committment and because I knew that these people really needed our help. I say when you make a commitment you keep it. The only thing that should keep you away is a family emergency or and illness. Otherwise you should be there if you voluntarily signed up.

The book I recommend this time is:
Grassroots: A Field Guide for Feminist Activism (Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards)

This is my voice

2007-09-08T21:50:00.000-07:00

I'm starting this blog because I want my voice to be heard...or I guess read. It's my last semester of college and then I start my life in the "real world". I'm living up my last semester of college by getting involved in groups and causes that I really care about. I've learned that I have a huge passion for social justice/women's issues. Last May I went on a trip to the Virgin Islands and I met the woman who I want to become. Her name is Clemma and she runs the Women's Coalition of St. Croix. The Women's Coalition helps the women in St. Croix when they are having issues with the men in their lives and helps them get their lives together if they need help. It's exactly the type of organization that I want to work for when I graduate.
A group that I recently got involved with on campus is FORGE (Fighting for Our Rights and Gender Equality). It's the activist group on campus and I love it. Another group that is connected to FORGE is BFF (Books For Feminists). We are reading My Year of Meats by Ruth L. Ozeki, and she is coming to our campus to have a dinner with us and speak to the whole University. I'm inspiried by authors because it's something that I've thought about doing since I was young. This blog is the start of my writing career. I hope you enjoy it and are inspiried by my thoughts as I've been inspiried by the thoughts of all authors that I've read.

Book that I recomend (this will be in every entry because I love reading and I want to share with you where I get my inspiration)
-My Year of Meats (Ruth L. Ozeki)